What to look for in the perfect Mentor
I am a true believer that everyone needs a mentor to help grow their success. Whether you’re building a business, running a company, going to school…it doesn't matter. Having someone on your side who has been where you are and willing to share their knowledge and expertise to help you is a gift, and I will never forget how I found my first “gift”. I was a brand new Executive Director and I didn’t know many people in my new professional world (and quite frankly, I was intimidated by most of the people that were in it). I was desperate for someone to walk into my life with more experience and knowledge to help me navigate this whole new world…and that day came (a true example of how the universe will always have your back if you just ask). I was at a meeting where another CEO was speaking about her business and I took notice immediately. She carried herself onstage with such confidence and poise, she spoke so passionately about her business and she exuded EXACTLY everything that I wanted to model as a leader! It sounds a little stalk-ish, but my first thought was that I wanted to be just like her one day!
At this point in my career, I had become a master of stepping out of my comfort zone (pretty much on a daily basis back then) and I took a major step and reached out to this woman that I had never met before. She is truly one of the busiest women I know and I never expected to hear back from her, let alone hear back in a matter of minutes! She was thrilled that I reached out and scheduled a coffee chat for the next week….literally proving, yet again, that successful people will ALWAYS have the time for up and coming successful people.
Fast forward a week to our meeting, which I will never forget as long as I live (and will be forever grateful to her for). I was sitting in her large office, feeling a tad bit nervous (okay, super nervous)! This amazing woman was on a pedestal for me (and still is) and legitimately had Carrie celebrity status! I rehearsed our discussion in my mind several thousand times, and when I walked into her office, I lost it all. The conversation that I had memorized no longer existed (insert head slap here). So, rather then looking all poised and prepared, I blurted out (and not clearly, trust me) “what do I need to do to be a leader like you one day”? This amazing- and super busy woman- then spent an hour with me! Before we finished our first meeting, she offered to mentor me on a regular basis! That my friends, turned into many years of mentorship and learning from someone who I model myself to be like every day of my life!
I realize that not everyone is lucky enough to find a mentor as amazing as mine, but I will tell you that they are out there….you just need to be on the look out and take the leap!
Fast forward many years where I am now playing the role as “mentor” to many up and coming AMAZING leaders! I am honored and so grateful every time someone reaches out to me for help, and will always remember how I felt when my mentor agreed whole heartedly to help me! I want to give that same feeling to other people. If you are searching for a mentor and not sure what to look for, here’s what I recommend:
Look for someone who inspires you through their own actions and experience. If you have ever spoken the words “I want to be just like her one day”, then you’re golden!
Look for someone who aligns with your core values and everything that you truly believe in. Do they treat others the way you want to treat and be treated? Have they created a culture in their work that reflects on the culture you want to create?
You need to feel safe talking to them, free of judgement. You need to know that they are keeping everything confidential so you are comfortable talking to them about any of your challenges.
You need to feel that they will 100000% always have your back. I learned the hard way that not everyone wants to see you succeed, so be aware of how you feel when you are around them. Your gut very rarely lies to you…remember that.
If you’re heart and soul explodes with ideas and confidence every time you brainstorm with this person, then you’ve found your match! There’s nothing more exciting then having a conversation with like minded people who only want to see you rise and succeed!!!
Through all of my successes, there has ALWAYS been a mentor helping and cheering me on, and it is my mission to ensure that everyone who has a vision for a brighter future has access to a mentor to help them along the way!
If you don’t have a mentor, get one! It will truly change your life!
Carrie XO